Sunday, October 6, 2019

The Marriage Intrigue Among Modern African Youth

For a long time, marriage was viewed as a means to procreation and the decision to marry was mainly guided by passion among other societal values. However times are changing and lifestyles too. This has lead to a major complication when it comes to matters pertaining to marriage. Not only has it become quite intertwined with the economic wellbeing of the individuals involved but the education or should I say class plays a very big role.

As technological innovations enhance easy communication across the globe, marriages have gone a step further in the same way taking an international out look. This situation has seen the elite youth try to match marriage values from across the globe with those in the local settings. As much as we may appreciate the availability of positive core values worth emulating from the international scene, our local youth should also comprehend that the origin of certain values are based on a particular people's life style and culture which were no doubt shaped by their surrounding.

As many people get more educated and exposed to different experiences their perception of marriage and relationships in general are shaped by their experiences and ambitions alike. Let's take the case of a young woman who gets the opportunity to study in the western countries, upon the completion of her studies; she may be very much influenced by the urge to stay on if at all she has envied the lifestyle in the host country. If she happens to get back home without a partner, it will most likely be for the reason that she never managed to hook a potential husband abroad. Coming back into the country in the backdrop of such ambitions may automatically affect her perceptions of a possible marriage partner, this coupled with the feeling that she is more exposed than most of her local guys may make it difficult for her to settle for an unexposed young man for a marriage partner.

The highly educated woman and marriage

Although most men would be hesitant to admit their fear of a highly educated woman, it is quite true that many men do not like the thought of a more intelligent woman in their lives. They would rather have them for the sake of show offs at social gatherings as this will raise their status thus giving them a better bargaining chip when it comes to societal ratings. However when it comes to marriage, they would prefer women who are at least less educated as compared to themselves. This may be due to the fear of internal competition or merely a case of the traditional illusion that the man should be the head of the family in all respects. It is for this same reason perhaps that most men will not even entertain the thought of marrying a woman who is better placed financially. I think the whole thing is about the man feeling the potential threat to his authority.

How about the class issue?

In most traditional African cultures the man was groomed to be the overall provider for the family, give security as well as make any key decisions regarding investments among other important family decisions. Taking this into consideration, it may just explain to some extent why most educated women are finding it more and more difficult to get marriage partners. It should be automatic that class plays a role in matching people for marriage, whatever the term may mean to you. In the old kingdom days, princes were supposed to marry princesses and the lord's children were supposed to marry into other lords' families. Whatever the reason behind this was is quite debatable. There were nonetheless several tales of rich men marrying poor girls thus transforming their lives overnight from rugs to riches. The inverse situation however is quite rare phenomenon that may perhaps be explained by looking at what society's perception of marriage dictates. This may take two different dimensions as follows; is it the men who prefer to get women of lower stature in life or is it the women who would rather go for men of higher standing in life? What factors determine the success of a marriage between a poor man and a wealthy woman and vice-versa? This perhaps may be our next focus in our quest to the intrigue behind marriage in modern society.

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